When someone says something that is kind of stupid or downright hurtful are they responsible for your feelings?
This is a question I’ve been pondering for a while…
There are times that you can plainly see that what was said was thoughtless and didn’t need to be said.
I would like to think I’m the person who doesn’t blink an eye when what has been said is about me.
But it’s not true. Sometimes I blink my eyes a lot – holding back the tears.
I’ve watched this scenario play out several time’s in several different ways over the last several months and I’ve come to a conclusion.
No matter what someone says… no matter how hurtful or thoughtless it was for them to say it… you are still responsible for your feelings.
No one else can be responsible for how you feel. That is entirely on you.
And you can’t be responsible for how someone else feels. That is entirely on them.
And while I truly believe that we can not be responsible for someone else’s feelings, I think it’s always wise to be careful with your words.
They are so powerful.
Words break hearts, cause confusion, and start wars.
But words can also mend fences, provide comfort, and lift others to great heights.
I struggle so much with tough conversations. I know they need to happen, and I also know how important choosing the right words are. Sometimes you just don’t have the right ones.
I used to believe blurting out what needs to be said was the best way to do it. But I’ve changed my mind the more I’ve learned to respect the power of words.
What needs to be said still needs to be said, but there is a graceful way to say most things. And I’m still learning about that.
What I do know is that the more respect I gain for the power of words… the harder it is to even open my mouth to have hard conversations.
We can always aim to do better, and speak more eloquently, and deliver our messages honestly and kindly.