Have you ever been so scared that you acted in a way not true to who you are?
What if while living in that fear you wronged someone?
Would you apologize? Would you give with an explanation? Would you do it again?
Fear makes us do all sorts of crazy things we wouldn’t normally do which makes seeing it from the other persons point of view is so hard.
We get so caught up in our story and our own survival that we can’t see anything clearly.
I know this type of fear very well. I lived in varying levels of it for longer than I ever wanted to.
I behaved in ways I would never normally behave.
I said things I would never normally say.
I did things I would never normally do.
I felt like I was the victim of someone else’s rage and hatred, but in the end That didn’t matter. I had to apologize to for who I was in those moments of intense fear.
Owning and apologizing for who I was in my own insanity, without explanation or justification for it, and then seeing it from another persons shoes was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.
But it wasn’t until I got there, that I started to rebuild trust in those relationships.