It wasn’t that long ago I didn’t know my own value.
Deep down I always knew what made me unique, but I had kept myself quiet and hidden enough that my uniqueness wasn’t of much value to anyone because if they even knew what was inside of me existed, it wasn’t consistent and I couldn’t be depended on to show up, because I didn’t see the value in it.
So I became attached to things that were special outside of myself that I felt I had put my signature on.
If I had a neat trick, or if I had learned something or figured something out, if I had a saying or piece of wisdom or even a special recipe, I felt a little stab of betrayal when someone I had shared it with took and used it elsewhere.
I remember feeling like I had been used for my “cool stuff”.
Our extended family on my moms side has a special jello salad that my kids love. They look forward to every special occasion because no matter what the main course, it is at every meal and it has been for multiple generations now.
My daughter wanted to take it to dinner at her dads for Christmas this year. I thought it was sweet. Of course she could take a little piece of home with her. I helped her make it to take to her dinner.
At some point I realized what a different train of thought that was for me.
Somewhere along the way of writing this blog I have had a huge shift.
Maybe it’s the constant awareness of legacy being every life you touch and constantly working to reach further and farther…
Or maybe it’s the fact that I have forced myself, by writing daily, to share every little saying, piece of wisdom, or insight I have gleaned, because those make for the most interesting blogs…
Or maybe it’s because I have given myself a platform to feel seen and heard and I am just not attached to my “cool stuff” anymore.
I have noticed that the more you share, the more you want to share.
The more your value yourself, the less what’s on the outside matters.
The more love you put into everything, the more of your love gets into the world.