In case you aren’t a horse person, it would be helpful for you to know that horses are relationship experts. That’s why they use them in therapy for prisoners, PTSD, group training, and spiritual/personal growth.
Getting a 1000 pound animal to communicate and work with you willingly requires you to understand they dynamics of clarity, energy, intention, trust, fear, questions, answers, and team work. There is a lot of moving parts.
Every part can be applied to human relationships.
I took a clinic from Dan Duckering several years ago and one of the concepts he talked about was Respect. He asked us, “what is the definition of respect?”
We think we know what respect looks like, but coming up with a simple definition was hard. So he told us.
“Respect is the balance between trust and fear”.
I think about this every time the subject of respect shows up in my life.
If respect is a balance of trust and fear, then very few people actually have respect, although most people think they do.
The people who lean on the side of fear mistake that for respect.
The people who lean on the side of trust mistake that for respect (this is me).
What does the balance look like? They trust you to look after them, to be there, and to support them, but they have just enough fear that they don’t walk overtop of you.
In horses this creates a beautiful partnership. You always pay attention to what the other one is capable of on their own and in their power. And from there, you work together.