Once you are honest about what you want from a relationship, it makes it a lot easier to get it.
When the other person in your relationship has a lot stronger agenda than you do about the way things should be, it’s hard to stay on your mountain and remember what is right for you.
People pleasers struggle a lot here because we tend to put everyone else’s happiness before our own and sacrifice everything in the pursuit of it.
If you aren’t consciously honouring what’s important to you it causes all sorts of conflict.
The other person feels hurt that you aren’t on the same page because you are allowing their agenda… but you aren’t fully invested in it which causes strong emotions and accusations. You might try harder to please and move further away from what’s important to you.
When you can be clear about what you want, and brave enough to speak up about it, even when it feels like the opposite of someone else, you don’t compromise yourself.
When you don’t have to compromise yourself, your relationships become healthy and much more fulfilling.
First you have to sort out what you want… then you have to speak your truth. Neither of which are easy.