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Being Shown A New Habit 

by jodi // July 28


I have never read Stephen Covey. 

They use the 7 habits of happy kids in the elementary school my kids have attended (which was amazing) so I have some exposure to them, but I still have never read the book.   

I have never dug into the habits.  

Yesterday someone referenced the habit “seek first to understand, then to be understood” and this one really resonated with me.  

How many times do people try to help you without understanding you?

I took the kids to a chiropractor a few days ago.  

When I began to tell her about the problems my daughter was having with her wrist, she interrupted me and began to speak about how my daughters watch was too tight and it was causing all of the problems.  

1. We had just bought her the watch the week before, but she’s been having troubles with her wrist for at least 3 months.  

2. Her watch was tight.  She had tried to take it off when I started talking and as she pulled on it to unbuckle it, it slipped into a higher hole.  

Had she applied the Stephen Covey habit, and seeked first to understand our problem it likely would have changed her advice, and she wouldn’t have lost any credibility with me, or my kids… and maybe she could have helped.  

Instead she jumped to conclusions, never asked another question and fixed something that wasn’t the problem.  

By the way, the look on my daughter face was priceless as she politely listened to the lecture about having her watch too tight. 

How often do we all do this?

We think we know the answer/solution so we jump into a conversation wanting to help without understanding everything about the problem?

Seek first to understand… and then to be understood…and we will ALL benefit.  


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